Friday, January 28, 2011

tata .

why do people you want to be near have to live so far away and you just want to see them everyday..

 KL Central is waiting for me. Or shall I write, I'm waiting to arrive KL Central? LOL. Hope today will go smoothly, I'm riding to KL all alone. If last time you let me travel alone, I'll be super happy, but today my feeling is totally different. Why? Maybe I'm not used to be alone after some time? HAHA.

I care my feelings, I care how I feel. When others don't ever care, don't give up on yourself. That's my thinking right now. I will take care of myself =)  you might not need me today, maybe tomorrow, or maybe  not ever, But if you feel sad and alone, remember I'm here for you my friends. :)

Sometimes, I feel like crying, but  I'm too scare to show how lonely I'm. So I'll just put on a fake smile and try to live day by day.Bye Kampar.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

sPices of liFe~~

Good Evening, peeps.

Chinese New Year is around the corner. 
And yet, I think my house(hometown) haven't done decorated. 
& tomorrow I shall going back home. 
Then, here comes the time to clean&clear my house for the last minute. Hehe. 
Love the last minute feelings so much~ 
I think I'm going to break into many parts.

I miss my mum so much. 
Hope she's doing fine. 
My wish in 2011 is just very simple. 
I just wish that everyone is in a good health, especially my family member. Because I really love them so much, eventho sometimes my brother really irritating LOL. 
but yea, if you let me choose between HEALTH and others, 
I would say; HEALTH!

Love life? 
So far I think its going well, suppose? 
Tho sometimes we do argue and I do feel like a shit, but it just a small matter. 
Just a spice of life anyway. =) I'll enjoyed it. 
Because I know, I need to appreciate when he still loves me before it's too late. 
I know. 
And I love you. :D

Repeating one subject is suffer. 
You need to worry so much things. 
Sigh. I just hope that I can pass my FAF I and proceed to my FAF II. 
I hope, I hope and hope.

enjoy your CNY friends! ^^Y

Sunday, January 23, 2011

bo mood in the house

Mood very down. I just realized, I'm so lazy to fake a smile anymore. So many times I fake a smile and pretend I'm OK just not to make others worry and sad too. But this time I'm going to let them know how I feel. I'm not the one who can tolerate each thing that I dislike. I'm not the puppet for today. LOL. I'll move my way tonight.

Silence maybe is the best way to show my seriousness. Talk less is the best action I guess.

I wonder how many people know what I like, what I totally dislike and how many people do care about my feeling and thoughts? Sometimes, I rather to be alone, choose to be alone. Because, I somehow feel more secure to be alone than in a group. Maybe just for tonight? I feel that I need someone to talk to, but realize... sometimes, things are better to keep unsaid, cos' I can't figure out what's my problem and I won't want to find it out too. cos' when I start, it won't stop. =)

When I'm in a bad mood, you can choose to go away. But I tell you, when you decide that, I will pray that you go far- far away, don't ever come back. It's not that I don't wanna talk, but the more you ask for it, the more I'll kept quiet. Secrets need time to reveal, isn't it? 

Tonight, I will walk on my way. Take a fresh breeze, clear out my mind. Cry out loud for my uselessness. HAHHA. [gone] 

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A hope

Home is not home.

Although really dislike some people in this house, but as long as mum happy, I'm OK with that. I can wipe all the things that hurt me or happen just now if I can see mum be happy like last time. 
I can admit it is my fault, I can't control my anger, I don't respect some person & tho mum thinks I'm wrong but when I can see her smile again, everything will be alright. 

I just wish that, my home is really a home. 
I hate silence. 
I hate argument. 
I hate fighting. 
It's not like last time anymore. This house is losing its laughter. I miss that. Maybe each of us is losing the patience in this house. 
Just to tell that, money is not everything. 
You have money, but you lose in tighten the ties.

Lai Tian Li, PLEASE control your anger. Be patience. Talk less eventho you can fight back. 
Silence is action too.