Tuesday, February 24, 2009


Ladies and Gentleman,

Here I am. Writing this post.Yah.completely very down right now. I don’t know why. There’ve been a lot of thing suddenly messes up my mind lately.

Until last night, I had a..sms-fight with him.LOL.rite.I’m just unsatisfied with him.Reason:he’s not there when I really needed him like hell.When I’m so depressed,where-is-he?

I don’t know my destination.My life would be like what,what kind of roads I need to pass.What kind of challenges will be coming on my way?What is the purpose of living?What I want right now?Where should I go after this??

It’s a lot of stupid and easy questions,but,I can’t even have the answers..
So pathtic,right?

Business?or medical?choose.
Driving is a pressure or a hobby?
Working or studying?

Now my brain seemed like loaded with the information of collages and university.And now, worrying about SPM result.What if I don’t get the satisfied result?Damn-it!

Until just now,I heard a song.Gimme a lot of mind-thinking.Make me realize something.We should appreciate what we have right in front of us.Song tittle:Chong Lai by Sam Lee.Meaning,Once Again.
Sometimes I got the inspiration from Songs and Quotes.Even Idioms or Poems.
Now,its a song.
The comment from a viewer:
Human will only think of the good of your partner after everything has ended..”
Maybe that was right.It happened a lot of time.Even in drama,you can see a lot.Even in real life..right?

When 2 persons r still together, normally we'll think only the weaknesses of the relationship..”
Just like what had happened to me and him.I’ve been thinking that he doesn’t care ‘bout my problems..maybe he did,but I am the one who not realize ‘bout that..Maybe all this time,I just care about my feeling.till I fogot about him..his perfectness and all the good things..

So,think more of the strengths of your partner instead of weaknesses when 2 persons r still belong to each other..
Yah.That was right,now,we still be together,so why not just..Apreciate it.I just doesn’t want to regret later..gosh..after my stupid attitude and all childish thingy..I’ m sorry..

And since everything has ended, it will be useless to look at the good...n forget the weaknesses. Life is looking forward not looking backward...”
Since everything had passed, just let it passed. It’s no meaning for looking back. Just make it a lesson, and life goes on. Future is the main point and the goal!!

See. How a comment can make me realize something. I usually hypnotized myself like that. Something likes counseling myseslf.lol.
Funny. But true.

Honey, I’m really sorry bout what I’ve done. I know I shouldn’t say something like I hate myself. It’s because I want to attract your attention and careens omly.Sorry.I will learn to love myself. I will not cry anymore. I promise to face the problems bravely. Not hiding myself..

Love my family and everyone. Sorry.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

what's the end?

"I can't see any clue.Not even one.So,honey tell me what's going on right now?"

Now i realise,i'm not so understanding.I don't even know what's is he thinking.
I hate myself so much!

It's been a few days since we never contact.I've tried to message you,but no reply.
What's going on?Am i too selfish,caring my self-problem,and leave you behind?Well,if i do,sorry dear.Today is valentine day.Please reply me.I do care!

You make me remind of my ex.He did the same thing.Before he dump me,he close his phone,not replying my message.Or answering his phone.He used the lame tactic ever.And i later get to he returned to his ex girlfriend..how 'bout me?
I'll be alright,just a broken heart.Take time to heal the wound!

Now,i just don't want history to repeat.Don't tear my dreams...
Tell me,even if you wana breakup,just tell me..
Don't make me hate LOVE.

I trust you.You are not that kind of person.

With love,
I'm me.