Wednesday, October 2, 2013


I'm back to activate my blog. I'm here, again.

This time, October 2013. Soon will enter 2014 after 3 months. Another year pass. I can feel how this year end so fast, so fast. What will my 2014 be? I guess, the coming road will be harder to cope, but as I said before, nothing can actually beats me down, I've go through the worst, and I'm able to stand back,. why wouldn't this time? Come what may..

Currently at hometown. Wisely using this time to re-think my future again. What path I'm going to take. Seriously. Because, someone reminded me how to plan. Plan for the best and worst. Will be right back to you peeps after figure it out. :)

Still have friends asking about the relationship bet. me and him. No one actually knows what happen to us in the end. Some close friends knew about it. But, it doesn't matter.. I'm still learning how to let go. I'm still holding the ring that he gave me. The one that I keep asked him to buy for me. Not willing to throw away yet, why? Because I'm still learning how put down all the memories and feelings (they can't be forgotten).

What if he comes back for good? I will still say no. I don't deserve him. I doesn't want to go back to the past, anymore. It brings a thousand pain memories that I can't even forgive myself. What I can do now is, slowly letting go. If, oneday.. I throw it away.. please congrates me, because.. I finally found my freedom. :) "born again"

It did brings heartache, pain and regret. But this taught me something. "value your loves one".

To another him:
I'm sorry for my ignorance. You asked me, if I was given a chance, will I do it again? Answer is, no. I will not do it again, I rather not the meet you. But I'm not blaming anyone. What is going to happen will anyway happen. And it happen for some reason. Which is a lesson. Until now, I'm still learning how to forgive myself.

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