Wednesday, September 2, 2009

suicide is painless?

Things get so complicated lately, especially dealing with my family members. Suxx is all on word I can describe about my feeling. They keep relate me with problems which I don’t think is very very important, it’s just a small matter but they keep it long and lasting and forever. Just like this case. OMG, just gimme a break la!! I promise I can do it, I sure I can make it! And, my study is nothing kindda related to these things. I just don’t understand why they keep telling me not to do this and that,. I KNOW what I am thinking and what decision I’m going to take. Okey, I admit that in this case is really my fault! But, please don’t make it serious and relate it to my study, Fuck lo. I hate people accused me with a thing that which I don’t really meant it.

These days, my mood really down to zero and I have limited tolerance. I know the reasons, and I’m still searching for the best solutions. I keep pushing myself to the limit, and make myself happier than usual, act like nothing ever happened, yes, I did it! But whenever I’m alone and alone and alone again in my room, those problems keep coming heading towards me, it’s just like the rain that will never stop. I really don’t know what to do… and I nearly…

Someone save my life. And I do appreciate him. Thanks. A LOT. I f not I don’t think I can see the world today. X)

Someone asked me to write my happy episodes in this blog. But I need to explain here that, I don’t and can’t find any suitable place for me to release my stress, so blogging is one of my way to express out what I feel bad. I just think that you guys can see my happy face everyday, so I need not to emphasis here again, lols… and now, you guys can see what a bad days I gone through lately… so soo-o-rry, no happy news here… x( maybe one day I will try to do that!

No comments :